September 18, 2010

let it flow

As those drops fall


I thank the rain god

How sublimely it says, sorrow never stays

Livid air

And a few drops

Whisper in my ears

I am there

Creating warmth

I hadn’t felt for long

Wrapping me in his assurance

Nothing lasts forever

Drains the pain in me

Those wounds wont bleed now

Now that horizon looks like

A sheath of protection

Closing up on me

Breathing

Now I can give out a sigh

Cry

The swaying air cradles my soul

Putting those fears to sleep

Once again

Will it rain?

Become my tears

July 12, 2010

square garden

Step by step
I walk the path
That squares the garden
The step increases the speed
To escape slumber
To burn another calorie
To fuel the heartbeat
The source- the garden
Which is over brimming with life
The kid there knows what life is
The mother playing with him knows how life is
The person walking behind me knows
How many more kilometers to walk
I see people walking ahead of me
I slow down not to to overtake them
But I know how it feels to lag behind
I go green seeing the grass so lean
I long to be a baby sitting
The one over the grass
So ignorant
I crave to take a moment and lie on the grass
Gasp a breath of air
To exorcise me
Exhume the soul dormant inside me
But alas, my legs hate to stop
Its taken its path
The stones that square the garden
That borders life
Confines happiness
In the nature to its inside
Its mundane outside
Where people drive and shout
When the sun blocking glasses
Blind them to see the pristine spring
The aged chat of years of glory
Live every moment of their life
That shall soon cease
My legs can’t stop
My eyes hate to blink
For it craves for that fling
Those two kids have
For minutes in their game
My legs go fatigue
Yet they walk like a headless man
For its path shall never change
I walk on that path
Regretting every moment
I have miles to go before I blink
Oh, I have miles to go to burn those calories

June 16, 2010

its something i wrote on 28th nov.... after a lot of moving news about the Taj attach and its effects on 'innocent' people's lives

My mortality take me home
Away with my music my sagging spirit
My nations mourns for all the deaths
But it doesn’t move
Shake us all
So that we may live as brothers
Show us all how it feels when your son doesn’t return home
When you just know that he is not well
Don’t know if he is dead or hurt
We sympathize but never empathize
Curse but never redress
We don’t even see others’ ‘grief
What if we were a part of it?
Am I not now?
So numb, dormant and indifferent
Would this stone ever move?
Or will it when it sees everyone else down in blood
Your ignorance’s fruit
What are we here for?
Sit back and watch the sea of death and demise and condole
Wouldn’t you move my nation?
We are liberated, independent
But not yet alive

June 10, 2010

turning point

This is my turning point on my journey
Where I have to turn, bend
They say that it is the way
For that is the way everyone takes
It is the road that has been beaten up by every foot
No stone left unturned
Yet no one dares to walk the other way
This is the turning point
Which would turn my life
From mine to theirs
Transfer its identity to match the mob
It is no more an entity
Lose its gravity to walk on the ground
The way everybody does
This is my turning point
Which will bend me until
I break

losers' paradise

Welcome to losers’ paradise
Where everybody is alike
Long faces, pumpkin expression
Anger frustration
Dejection and pity
Under confidence, no confidence
Tears, fears
Blue purple black
Blank shameful dark
No one thinking anything except
That moment of fiasco
The tape stuck on that scene
No one knows who is sitting next
The one who does sees the worst
One from nowhere stood up
‘what have we lost that we are in so much pain?’
(Unanimous unspoken voices- what not?)
Cuz no pain no gain
So welcome to losers’ paradise
Where losing is a game
We all are shameless winners

April 25, 2010

Lend me a drop of tear

Lend me a drop of tear
I need to cry
Break this silence
It’s a pain
That only I can feel
Now I want to break down
It’s too heavy to keep within
I’ll give up my pride
I can’t stride
With blind thoughts
And blinding vision
It’s difficult to cry
What if I do?
Afraid to fall
For I’ll never get up
Too willing to implode and get buried
Under my debris of sorrow
Is there a drop of tear I can borrow?
Now they are drying
Spirit of meaning
Is there a drop of tear I can borrow?
To burry my sorrow
Let their ghost explain the pain
Or will the tears go in vain?

January 10, 2010

where do i begin?

As the world moves round
Around me
The clock moves around
Sages preach the art of living
I sit and listen
Inspired
Afraid to perspire
But I am still tired
I read history of great men
Too impressed
Still feeling suppressed
Yes, too many here are depressed
It’s so futile
The roads so beaten up
Dreams so clich├ęd
Yours and mine
Differ yet meet
At the end of the road
Few reach
Others preach
Where do I begin?
How do I end?
It’s not out of your reach
it’s from where it all begins
The answer lies within

July 21, 2009

burried myself

Now in the coffin
where it’s only me
no one to even mourn
I mourn with remorse
am I so worthless?
Or am I denied of my worth?
Am I alive
or as good as dead?
Should I live
or hide in the coffin?
To hide myself
should I grieve or go numb?
Dig inside to find myself
or keep digging to find more dirt?
Light a candle and see light
or burn myself
till my ashes disappear?


I fell so worthless
my veins shrink with shame
I’ll never be the same
now it’s given me a new name
but as I sit here in the coffin
I realize, I’d better lie down there
so that no one can find me anywhere

pray, my love

Pray, please
somebody save my love
he is dying in my brutal love
I love you too much
You loved me a little less
I held your arms...
Didn’t know
they'd leave scars...
I kissed u...
not knowing they'll burn you
I clenched to you
when you'd begin to go
I tore my heart to show
my love inside
oh, I realize now, it was only mine
not ours
pray, please
my love is dying
stop! the gruesome me is unleashing
to tear his heart to see if there was ever any love
pray , my lord
my love, talk to me
I haven’t killed u yet
wont you?
Look at me
am I so unworthy?
Pray, my love, save me
I’ll save you
pray my love...
Love me
I still love you...

July 02, 2009

inject my pain

shivering with fear
ignorant of my state
crumbling with shame that’s too great
those holes in my veins
show me the hollowness
that i have carved
for 3 months
i let the elixir feed on me
consume a part of me
it was ecstasy
now, it is but fantasy
i was locked behind the cell of delusion
now i know, it is not even as gracious as an illusion
i tried to forget myself
surrendering myself
to my almighty in the bottle
locking myself behind the dark steel bars
to serve a sentence of numbness
the needle of syringe
gave me new blood
that ruled my nerves
i was soaked in the blood
of this painless pain
mourning for the disgrace i have become
my stomach groped
can i get one more doze?